Kick the Can

do you remember this game from your childhood? When I was growing up there were a lot of kids on our block. Roughly 20 close to my age and then there were the ones on either side of that. When we played a game of Kick the Can it was a big deal.

Memories are of the Rea's front yard where the can was placed. I can imagine the layout of the yards on either side of theirs. Often it came down to who was the fastest. I actually have a lot of childhood memories.

• cowboys and indians

• cops and robbers

• skipping and hopscotch

• hiking all over Bear Hill

• riding our bikes all over hither and yon

Sadly one of the reasons I have so many right now is three kids I knew from the block have passed away in recent years. It has brought up many different emotions especially since I am in the process of writing my second book, Look Sandy I Can Fly. This book covers a period of time when my immediately family experienced two tragic deaths, one a suicide and one a totally unexpected death of natural causes. I felt as though I had been dragging my butt around. Not knowing what to do with myself. The day of the most recent gathering I woke feeling ill. In this day and age it is best to err on the side of caution. With this in mind and with a heavy heart I readied myself to call my neighbor from the old days, my second mom. Just before I did, as I sat there second guessing my decision, my childhood friend whose service it was suddenly appeared before me. I could see him plain as day, with a big grin on his face. I felt a lot better seeing him. It was as though he was giving me the allowance to do what I needed to. The call to my second mom from the neighborhood went well, although I heard from her about some of those that would be there. To be honest sometimes it is difficult doing what is right.

It has also been in the days after that I felt like I let myself down. Here had been a great chance to see a lot of kids from the block and other locals. And I didn't go... It kept swirling around in my head.

I spoke with my husband about my feelings. He put it into perspective for me. If I had gone to this event, there for sure were people I knew. Yes it was outside however I am a huge hugger! Some of these people were definitely senior citizens and had their own compromised health issues. My second mom being one of them.

He said I could have gone and worn a mask. It was outside too. Then he laughed and said, "Oh yeah it's YOU!" A direct reference to my hugging trait. lol...

I did the right thing. Where have you been second guessing yourself and a decision you made? I am here to chat if you would like some clarity. Send me a message at thesandini@gmail.com